sex, money, and miscellany: talking about what matters

Posts Tagged ‘politics’

how not to make things worse

In Uncategorized on August 15, 2010 at 5:31 pm

I’ve said this a lot, but this blogger says it better. So go here. Read up. Uppity Brown Woman knows her shit.


ten tips for a relaxing summer

In Uncategorized on July 19, 2010 at 5:33 pm

We’re halfway there! Summer is half over. If we run from June to August, July 15 (is that the ides of July?) is the tipping point.

Does that make you feel better, or more frenzied than ever?

When I was in school, summer was relaxing. The whole point read more

there are no words

In Uncategorized on June 23, 2010 at 12:06 pm

Millennialism: not just for millennials

In Uncategorized on June 4, 2010 at 8:14 am

We have a tradition in this country of dividing things up by age. We go to school by age unless we’re Montessori or home schooled, we shape our lives by where we’re supposed to be, we do things in order…

or we used to. Word on the street is that the millennial generation–those born 1978ish through 1998 and just now coming to power–isn’t waiting. read more

change making, change breaking

In Uncategorized on May 17, 2010 at 9:35 am

Change is hard for humans. We just don’t like it. We like routine, we like familiar, we like predictable. We’re hard-wired for it. But change, adaptivity, evolution are how we got to be human in the first place, and they are also how we stay human. Paradoxically, we stay ourselves only by continuing to change.

Sharon Welch, one of the administrators at my alma mater, discusses here at Tikkun’s website the patterns of change and read more

writers hate criticism

In Uncategorized on May 16, 2010 at 3:13 pm

…but we rarely get better without it–as long as it’s constructive. There’s an interesting email exchange between a tech columnist and Steve Jobs over at about the iPad and freedom from porn(!) but what caught my attention was this quote, from the comments:

It is not the critic who counts; read more

a little like stealing your diary

In Uncategorized on May 16, 2010 at 10:28 am

Facebook is doing more and more with user data, and according to this writer at Gizmodo, trying to be as un-transparent about it as possible. Big brothers shouldn’t do stuff like that.

go gently

In Uncategorized on May 10, 2010 at 10:39 am

I do life coaching, and one of my specialties is something I call sex-positive coaching. I’ve had a number of questions about what I mean by it. I could talk for five minutes or five hours, but the short answer is this: I mean a kind of coaching that can draw on your experience of your sexuality to inform our work together, where sex and sexuality are a welcome part of the larger conversation, and that is regardless of .what. that experience is. My beliefs about sexuality have to do with pleasure and empowerment–as long as it’s safe, sane, and consensual:

from Wikipedia:

safe: attempts should be made to identify and prevent risks to health
sane: activities should be undertaken in a sane and sensible cast of mind
consensual: all activities should involve the full consent of all parties involved

if it brings pleasure, a person should be able to ask for it/try to get it/make it happen. We are not passive participants in life, we are active participants. And if it doesn’t bring pleasure, you shouldn’t do it. That includes sex at all, relationships of lots of different stripes, and just about everything else. The line starts to get fuzzy when it comes to life itself–if life isn’t bringing pleasure, there are lots of options other than suicide.

The pleasure factor is key for me. The choice factor is central. So my definition of “sex-positive” probably has some differences from the ones described in this article about sex positivity and feminism. Since I ALSO consider myself feminist I’m finding myself quite in the middle (as usual). Still, I think the ideas about a shame-pride-arrogance continuum are very useful. And the bottom line? Go gently.

anti-anti-racism unpacked

In Uncategorized on April 29, 2010 at 8:04 am

I need to eat breakfast, so this is a very quick post, but I had to share. Over at racialicious they’ve posted a fantastic piece on racism/privilege/oppression. Of special interest to me were these two passages:

“Anti-racism and people of colour organizing is -read more>


In Uncategorized on March 24, 2010 at 7:14 am

My acupuncturist has been after me to eat meat.

I was a vegetarian for 15 years. The year I turned 30 was the third year of intense cravings for a raw, pink fish that I had identified as salmon. I would get images of it even before I knew what it was; I knew what it would taste like, feel like in my mouth, and I knew it would satisfy some kind of deep nutritional need. I tried everything else: flaxseed for omega-3’s, eggs for protein, more food, less food, better quality food. Portland, Oregon was a good place to exhaust my options, and exhaust them I did. At last it was over. There was nothing left to try, and keep reading